Have you ever been unfaithful to your partner at least once? Research suggests that anywhere between 11 and 35% of people cheat, and women are doing it more often, too. Yet, experts say that strengthening your relationship might be a better use of your time than looking for signs of infidelity. Sue Johnson, author of Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, said “for the overwhelming majority of affairs, it’s not about sex – it’s about people feeling lonely. “So how can you reconnect with your partner and keep your relationship healthy? Here’s the 5 amazing tips on how to keep the home fires burning:
1. Touch each other
Research shows that couples who touch non-sexually everyday has increased level of oxytocin (the bonding hormone). Giving little smooches on the lips and cheek or touch when you pass one another at a party can create a strong bonding between you both.
2. Use kindness, not curtness
When you make that special dish for him and he just doesn’t appreciate you, can make a person open to cheating or an emotional affair, says experts. A sincere compliment or a thoughtful gesture that really speaks to your partner’s interests. A ticket to a hockey game rather than chocolates or flowers, for instance can go a long way. Likewise, be careful about being over critic. Save major criticisms or any issues your partner is sensitive about for a sit-down discussion.
3. Solve little problems at the earliest
Healthy relationships need attention and care. It’s much easier to work through a disagreement and sooth hurt feelings when they are small and manageable. Ego clashes are one of the major reasons why young couples get divorced very early. If you continue to feel annoyed and upset about something for longer than a day, it will bring cracks in your relationship. It’s smart to get clear within yourself about the issue and then communicate with your partner about it.
4. Tell them what you need
Your partner cannot read your mind. They cannot read what’s going on through your mind, neither do they have sixth-sense. You have to share with your partner what you long for in your relationship. This includes telling them not only the small things, like how you like your coffee in the morning, what you like to be heard when dressed up in a new dress. Don’t expect things to change in your relationship if you haven’t shared what you want. It’s not fair to be disappointed if they haven’t sent you flowers on your birthday if you haven’t told them you like flowers and surprises.
5. Have sex
You have no right to blame your partner if you are bored with your sex life. It you are bored, so are they. It’s your fault too. Share some fantasies. Dig deep and talk something naughty. Even if you never take a fantasy into action, it’s the discussion about the fantasy that will turn both of you on. This will bring the egotism back in your life. Your mind is the sexiest thing you own, and so don’t waste your time.
If you can do these 5 things in your life, trust me, your relationship will be the strongest and deepest one. Besides, you will be so busy happily working on your own relationship, where will you ever find the time.